dont read it!!!

Ever get a phone call from your ex and you knooow you shouldn't answer it? Or a voicemail you know you shouldn't listen to? An email you shouldn't read?

Then for some reason, you do it anyways? Really, you know no matter it what it says, "youre a bitch" " i love you and wanna get back together" "blah blah blah im dating someone neww alreadddy=] " ...its not gonna make you feel any better than you do. We KNOW we should just take satisfaction in knowing THEY were thinking about US because theyre the ones that made contact and we should just delete it. But we don't..



Why?

I had a Dream...

Last night was one of those terrible dream nights where you keep waking up but every time you go back to sleep it just starts up again! ALLL night I had to deal with a dream about my ex. We were back together and he came to visit me. However, while he was visiting me he was pretty much ignoring me and making friends at my school, going to parties, etc. Then I found out he slept with a girl from my high school who I was alwaaays jealous of and when I confronted him about it he acted like it was no big deal and it was gonna happen again so I should get used to it. I was soo hurt I decided to try making him jealous so he could see how ridiculous he was being. I said we should be in an open relationship ( I even changed my dream Facebook relationship status...thats how you KNOW im serious ) and he didnt care. At all. Maybe this dream doesn't sound as bad as I thought but if you could really picture it like I did, thinking it waas real, then youd know how bad it was. Even just having a dream im back together with him makes me sad. sigh.

So, what about you guys? Any dreams about exs?

Dear Mr.Wrong

Im reading the Perks of Being a Wallflower. I was really enjoying it. It just mentioned Ohio. Now I hate it.

  I hate anything or anyone that mentions Ohio, or Michigan, or Maryland, ...or the military, or graphic design, drawing, tattoos, DJing, roast beef,  Kraft dinner, onions, pork chops, sandwiches, ...movies like Monsters Inc, Lucky Number Slevin, or the  Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I hate going into a store and seeing Spongebob, prepaid cell phones, kittens. I hate dirt roads on a summer's day and big backyards. Water beds and Mac computers.  The smell of abercrombie and button down shirts.

I remember every bit of information from the past three years. It makes it impossible to hear or see anything without hurting.  The things that have no association with you become about you when I wonder what you would say or do if you were here looking/listening/talking about it with me. Memories that will never be.

Im not crazy. Im hurting. They say it goes away, so I'm not too worried about it.